When I grow up

I wrote this in 2007 or 2008. At the time I was trying to grow my hair long because I liked how Willie Nelson looked. (He was about 80 and I wasn't yet 40, so I'm not sure what I was thinking!)

When I grow up
I will wear my gray hair in a pony tail
Tied with a bright red band
And faded blue jeans
Sometimes with a vest and fedora
Or a shirt and cap
Maybe even a fishing hat or baseball cap
I will have a closet full of hats
And wear a different one every day

When I grow up
I shall sit on the park bench
And watch the people scurry by
And wonder why I didn't sit down long ago
I will smell the roses, and
Pluck a petal, to rub between my fingers,
Then give it to a small child

When I grow up
I will remember what it was like to be young
To fall in love, to discover new music,
To be passionate about everything
But long after the passion is gone
The love remains, a smoldering connection
Imbuing all of my senses
I shall not wish to be young again
But I will appreciate my life

When I grow up
I will finally be as old as I feel
I will cry at happy moments
And laugh at sad ones
I will love everyone (even if they don't know it)
And I shall find such peace
That when my time comes
I will not begrudge it

When I die
I want to be buried with my gray hair in a pony tail
Tied with a bright red band
And faded blue jeans
With a white shirt and a vest
But no hat
I will leave my closet full of hats
To someone who will
Wear a different one every day